Reflections

Stop dwelling in the past they say, it’s tiresome and dull

Maudling, filling your day with memories of yesteryear

Thoughts cobwebbed by the sepia moments of who I used to be

The past is not a comfortable armchair I wish to sit in

Instead it’s an old worn jacket I wear like a friend

There’s been a long stoney winding road beneath my feet

Quiet proof that I have travelled from somewhere to where I find myself today

I will not apologise for faltering and turning back sometimes

Or for listening to the many voices, people and beliefs that I outgrew and left behind

They are not ghosts come to haunt me in this wretched decay of memories

But lights within this chaotic dreaming sleep

Each mistake I have made is a stone I learned to step around, every sorrow a storm

And though the sky has cleared I still hear the distant thunder

I do not live in the past I carry it as proof of every road I have survived

Each memory, each mistake and storm has shaped the person I am still becoming